Category: Stories for Speakers and Trainers

From Yawn to “Tell me more”

How to Get Your Prospects, Clients, and Audience to Care More About What You Have to Say By Using Stories

Successful financial plansHe was killing me.

His non-stop description of the service he provides and all the details, background research, etc. was putting me into a coma.

Not wanting to be rude, I politely listened, but tried to indicate with vigorous head nods and quiet  “Yup…got it…” comments that we could move on to the next point.

Oblivious to my signals–or perhaps because he didn’t know an alternative approach–he continued to root around in the weeds.

At one point, he said something like “I don’t want to bore you with all the details” and then continued to do so.

I bet you have been on the receiving end of this type of sales conversation and you know how painful it is.

Have you been on the other side?

Have you been “that guy”?

If you are not using stories to show how your product or service helps people like your prospect and businesses just like your prospect’s, you probably are losing people that you could otherwise help.

 

Why Should You Use Stories in Your Sales and Consulting Conversations?

  1. We all love interesting stories. Ever notice how you perk up when a speaker tells a story rather than talks about concepts and ideas at an abstract, 30,000 foot level?
  2. They involve people at a more visceral, emotional level than if you just share facts and talk logic, which make your points far more persuasive and your message far more memorable.
  3. Because of points #1 and #2, when you tell stories well, you and your ideas become FAR more interesting to other people….which makes you a welcome guest wherever you go.
  4. They enable you to answer the “What’s in it for me?” question going on in your prospect’s head in a far more fascinating and powerful way…again…because it connects with them at an emotional, easy-to-relate-to level.
  5. They enable you to challenge someone’s objections or perspective in a respectful, non-confrontational way (after all…you’re just sharing a story about a conversation you had with another person, or an experience you had).
  6. They enable you to make complicated, difficult-to-understand, or industry-specific concepts and practices understandable to someone not in your field. Remember a confused mind loses interest and chooses inaction.
  7. When you tell the right story and tell it the right way, you are able to communicate how good you are in a subtle non-Donald-Trumpish way.

Two Stories You Must Master

While there are a number of story genres you can use to become a more compelling and influential communicator, let’s get you started with two.

Whether you are talking one-on-one, presenting to an audience, or writing, you want to use Pain stories and Pain and Promise stories.

I opened this post with a Pain story.

Rather than open with an admonition that you need to tell stories if you want to engage prospects, clients, and audiences more effectively, I shared a story of what happens when we don’t.

I shared that story because I wanted you to recall how you feel in those situations and therefore understand at a visceral level why it’s critical to “not be that guy.”

Pain stories are also a great way to start off a presentation. They immediately hook your audience into the pain that would motivate them to listen to your ideas and to your proposition.

The Pain and Promise story starts out with the pain, and then describes what happened once you helped that person or business with their source of pain. It communicates in a non-salesy way “Here’s what can happen to you if you work with me or buy my product.”

 

For More On How to Use Stories to Become a More Interesting and Persuasive Communicator

If you want to learn more about how to use stories to make your message come alive, come to upcoming seminar:

 

Tell a better story. Become more interesting. Grow your business.

 

When: June 24rd · 12:45PM-1:45PM

Where: O’Maine Studio, Portland, Maine

A Maine Startup & Create Week Partner Program

For more information

Jun 17, 2015 | 0 comments View Post

Use an Analogy to Pack a Punch: Togue Brawn shows you how

Togue holding scallopsTwo weeks ago, I heard one of the coolest examples of how analogies make your point pack a punch. It happened at a “pitch fest” hosted by the Maine Center for Entrepreneurial Development’s  Top Gun program.

Ten entrepreneurs pitched their ideas to an audience of several hundred, competing for a $10,000 prize. It was also a chance to hone their  pitch craft.

Several entrepreneurs stood out for their speaking skill.

One of them was Togue Brawn, founder of Maine Dayboat Scallops. who will be speaking on June 24th at the upcoming Maine Startup and Create Week.

First, she clearly had passion for the impact her business would have in the lives of her customers and the fishermen she served.

In fact, after the event, I was talking about what a dynamo she was to a seasoned angel investor–a man who has seen it all. He laughed and said, in true When Harry Met Sally fashion–“Yeah…I want whatever she’s having!”

Besides her  passion, one of the other aspects of Togue’s talk that stood out for me was how she used a powerful analogy to capture the difference her business makes.

In Made to Stick, Chip and Dan Heath cite analogies as being one of the six power tools of the communicator who wants to make their idea “sticky”–i.e. people can’t get it out of their heads.

Why are analogies such a powerful communication tool?

  1. They translate the unfamiliar into the familiar…making your idea easier to understand.
  2. They translate the abstract into the tangible. The brain has a much easier time processing concrete images and situations from real life than it does making sense out of abstract concepts. Also, because concrete images and real life situations have a strong sensory component, they evoke more emotions that abstract ideas that only involve the intellect. BTW…notice that this point is an abstract concept. Now…let’s share a specific situation and concrete image that will make this point much more understandable.

Before you hear Togue’s analogy, here’s some quick context, so it makes more sense…

As part of her Origin Story, she shared her epiphany about the plight of Maine’s scallop fishermen and their customers. Most commercially fished scallops that are caught in federal waters in boats that are out to sea for a week or more. These scallops, when sold to consumers as “fresh” can be 12 days old. Maine’s scallop fishermen are all of the dayboat variety, meaning they go out and come back with their catch in one day.

Their scallops are a day old. But…because no delivery system existed to get these into customers’ hands, Maine day scallop fishermen can’t charge the premium price their premium product deserves. Instead, their uber-fresh scallops have to go to the same processing plants as the federal water harvested scallops that are several day’s old. So day old scallops get mixed in with a week or more old scallops.

Now here’s the analogy Togue used to make her point about how this didn’t make sense:

“That’s like pouring a bottle of Dom Perignon into a bathtub of Barefoot bubbly,” she noted.

When I heard that, I thought “Score! What a way to capture the difference.”

While there’s a reason why Barefoot wine is a popular brand, there’s a reason why Dom Perignon has a cachet that popular consumer brands’ don’t. If you made Dom Perignon, would you want it blended into any popular consumer wine and sold at that price or…would you want to get the price your product should command?

While giving the factual differences between scallops harvested in federal waters vs. those harvested by local scallop fishermen made for a clear comparison at the abstract, intellectual level, Togue’s analogy made it tangible. The listener could instantly get the difference at a deeper, more experiential level.

Hence, the power of a good analogy.

So…if you want YOUR ideas to pack a punch, start generating analogies to make your points hit home.

To learn more about how to use analogies and stories to make your ideas more interesting and persuasive, come to:

Tell a better story. Become more interesting. Grow your business.

 June 24rd · 12:45PM-1:45PM

Who should attend: Business owners, self-employed professionals, leaders and others who want to communicate the value of their ideas, service, and business in a more compelling, interesting, and persuasive way… whether in front of a group or one-to-one.

Where: O’Maine Studio

Fee: $10 for attendees at Maine Startup and Create Week, $15 for non-attendees (includes lunch)

A Maine Startup & Create Week Partner Program

 

 

 

Jun 16, 2015 | 0 comments View Post

More great examples of how to tell a story from Entrepreneuronfire.com

john lee dumas

If you are an entrepreneur who wants to be a more interesting interviewee or speaker, one of THE best places to get schooled in this is John Lee Dumas’s podcast Entrepreneur on Fire.

When it comes to the importance of communicating your message via stories–and not abstract terms and speaking at the 30,000 foot level–John totally gets it.

And…he’s not shy about calling out guests who don’t tell stories after he asks for one (and has sent them prep material ahead of time). I’ll be dissecting one of these examples soon, but in the meantime, here’s an example of how to do it right.

Check out Podcast 703 of EntrepreneursOnFire for more great examples of how to tell compelling stories.

In this episode, John Lee Dumas interviews David Long of MyEmployees.com.

While I recommend listening to the whole interview, the two stories I want to highlight here start at 8:15 and then at 15:06. They are worth listening to solely for the messages about turning adversity into opportunity and “going for it,” they are also worth listening to simply because they are great examples of how to tell a story.

As you listen to Dave share these two experiences, notice how you can imagine being there with him. It isn’t a dry account of a series of events, but rather compelling stories that draw you in and evoke your emotions.

So…listen away and experience some more excellent examples of how to tell compelling stories from Entrepreneursonfire.com.

Podcast 703 with David Long

To learn more about how to be a great storyteller, check out Powerful Storytelling Techniques

Jun 14, 2015 | 2 comments View Post

Far From Over Reminds Us That, No Matter How We Might Feel…”It’s Far From Over”

I want to share the video below both because of its message and because it is a great example of how you can take a story, whether in written form or through video, and use it as a teaching metaphor.

The video comes courtesy of friend and colleague John Brubaker, aka Coach Bru. 

John, a master at taking everyday experiences and turning them into teaching stories, shared the video below on Facebook, with the comment:

“Don’t despair if your 2015 has gotten off to a slow start. It’s “far from over” & this could be you..”

You might feel like that or, you might feel like:

  •  One or more important goals are seeming so out of reach.
  • You haven’t accomplished anywhere near what you think you should (whether in the last year or in your life).
  • You’ve been struggling with something, perhaps getting a business off the ground, writing that book, or maybe something in your personal life that seems never-ending, and it seems like the “light of day” will never come.

Do any of these resonate with you?

OK…let’s watch the video.

When you’re done, here are a few ways you can use it as a teaching tool:

  1. In your own life, use it to reflect on situations like the ones mentioned above.
  2. In a workshop where you want to help shift people into a more empowered, possibility-filled state, have them watch this video, or one like it. Then, have them either write about, or brainstorm with a partner, how they can see their situation in a new light and what they can do to make progress in it.
  3. As an example for you to be on the lookout for other inspiring videos and stories to help people shift from helpless or “I can’t” to hopeful and “I can.”

 

Post by NYRA.

 

When you’re done watching it, here are a few ways you can use it as a teaching tool:

  1. In your own life, use it to reflect on situations like the ones mentioned above.
  2. As a way to shift people’s state from feeling hopeless to hopeful. After you have them watch the video–or videos like it–have them either write about, or brainstorm with a partner, how they can see their situation in a new light and what they can do to make progress in it.
  3. As an example for you to be on the lookout for other inspiring videos and stories to help people shift from helpless or “I can’t” to hopeful and “I can.”

 

Feb 08, 2015 | 0 comments View Post

Marketing Genius Jeff Walker demonstrates the power of a story to make your point pack a punch

jeff walkerListen to Jeff Walker share his “light bulb going off” moment about what you need to do to separate yourself from the competition.

Notice how you can picture in your mind the scene as he describes it.

Notice how much more real–and horrifying–his discovery feels because it’s embedded in a story.

If he just gave you the take away message, you would be like “Oh yeah…I already know that.”

But the story, especially the visual, makes the point pack a punch.

After watching the video, think about your key take away messages. Think about the points you want to pack more of a punch.

Then…come up with stories that make that happen.

Want help doing that? Email me and we’ll talk.

 

 

Jan 19, 2015 | 2 comments View Post

Nervous About Speaking? Just Add Stories: A Debrief of My Semi-Impromptu #SMBME Talk

30816077_sJust before heading out to the Social Media Breakfast of Maine’s meeting (check out #SMBME for tweets from the crowd), I checked my email. It was 6:20 AM.

Much to my surprise I found an email from the event’s organizer, Amanda O’Brien, which had been sent the night before. Her email said she had just noticed I was attending the program and wondered if I would like to speak, too. The topic was storytelling and writing. The main speaker was the author of Everybody Writes, and content marketing guru Ann Handley. Since Ann was going to focus on writing, Amanda wanted to know if I would speak about storytelling in general.

Sure, glad to, I responded.

While I was “glad to,” there was also a problem with this.

Even though I have spoken at conferences around the country and overseas for over two decades, speaking doesn’t come easily for me. I’m not the guy who can’t wait to get in front of a group and talk. It takes me awhile to formulate what I want to say. But…I love storytelling and I also had witnessed what a fun group this was, so it seemed like a great opportunity to share something I love with people I enjoyed.

While I rarely get nervous when I give a talk, because I didn’t feel prepared, my stomach quickly knotted up and my heart started racing.

As I drove into Portland, I started thinking about what key points I would make and stories I would tell to illustrate those points.

At the breakfast, instead of mowing through multiple plates of eggs and bacon from the breakfast buffet and catching up with friends who were also attending, I jotted down thoughts and formulated a simple outline. At one point, I asked my friend and copywriter, Nina Hope, to distract me by telling me the funny story she had emailed me a “teaser” about.

After the sponsors were introduced and spoke briefly, it was time for me to speak.

I walked up to the front of the room, my stomach still in a knot and my heart still racing.

In the audio below, you will hear what I said.

Now…I am sharing this context and the presentation with you for a couple of reasons.

First, if you have stage fright, this will hopefully help you see how storytelling can help you settle down and actually enjoy your talk.

Second, I want to “pull back the curtain” and share with you some of the intentionality that goes behind storytelling.

You can approach what follows in two different ways. First, you can listen to the 10 minute recording below and THEN read my explanation and analysis or…you can read the explanation and analysis first, whichever works for your learning style.

So here goes…

My original plan was to first tell a story about an expert in the field of mind/body medicine who was bombing on stage and how storytelling saved the day for him. This type of story, what I call a Pain and Promise Story. The Pain and Promise Story grabs the audience’s attention because it speaks to a pain they feel and a hope they have about that pain going away. So it both resonates with their current situation—“I understand you”—and promises an antidote to their plight. This story genre immediately grabs the audience’s attention because it communicates “This will be helpful to you.”

My original planned evaporated when my butterflies did not.

I decided instead to start off with a different story, a funny story, because I needed to relax. Because it’s always been a real crowd pleaser and because it’s funny, I knew it would put me in a more upbeat, having-a-good-time state. So at the last minute I decided to start off with that story instead.

Then, I did the “expert bombing on stage” story. I was going to tell one last story that illustrates how you can use stories to challenge people without being confrontational—which is one of THE most useful applications of storytelling.

I call these the How to Say “You’re Crazy” in a Nice Way Stories.

I wanted to include this story in my short presentation, because this story genre helps people address one of THE most challenging situations for people, especially those in sales, coaching, and leadership positions. It helps them challenge people’s perspectives, beliefs, and excuses without triggering defensiveness and antagonism. I also wanted to include this point about what storytelling can do, along with a story to illustrate the point, because it shows how storytelling isn’t just a presentation tool.

But…when I got to this point in my talk, I felt like I was going to go over the 10 minutes I was shooting for, so I decided NOT to tell that story, but to instead use an analogy to make the point.

I love the analogies for making your point punchy in a fraction of the time.

Analogies are a great way to make your abstract idea concrete in a very short amount of time. If you don’t have much time to make your point, either because of time constraints or because your audience is filed with impatient people (e.g. busy executives in a meeting), analogies are a great alternative to stories.

What was I thinkin’?

OK, here are stylistic and technical notes, both to illustrate the intentionality that went into different aspects of the how the stories were told, as well as how it could have been improved.

How to Make Your Story More Relatable – In the first story, I talk about how I had blown my situation out of proportion. I had turned it into an “If I blow this keynote, it will be a career-ender.” I could have left it at that, but instead I followed that with something like “You know how we do that… we take something that is a little deal and turn it into a BIG DEAL…so maybe it’s like you get the chance to speak in front of senior leadership and you think ‘If I blow it, I’m going to be fired’ or maybe you have a business idea and you want to pitch it to a group of venture capitalists and you think ‘If I blow this…I’ll never get another chance.’”The language pattern that starts with “You know how we do that…” and is followed by experiences the audience can relate to, comes from the world of hypnosis.

It’s what I call a Linking Phrase.If you want the listener to connect at a more visceral level to your story, you use a Linking Phrase to link the experience you are talking about with one or more “versions” they have probably experienced. Doing this increases the listener’s interest at the conscious level because they can see the direct connection between your experience and theirs. It also increases the listener’s connection at the unconscious level because it signals “this is relevant, so pay attention.” It also stimulates greater interest because it stirs up emotions they have around their version of the challenge you are sharing.

Why You Might Use Your Version of My Opening Story – A couple of the reasons why I like using the first story as an opener:

  • It’s a great ice breaker.
  • As I mentioned before, it helps relax me because it’s a fun story to tell.
  • It helps the audience bond with me because it’s a self-effacing story. It shows that I am not coming to them as a guru or in a one-up position. I am coming to them as a fellow human being, an equal (who just happens to have some specialized knowledge or expertise).
  • It also subtly communicates credibility, without sounding like I am tooting my own horn. The fact that I was asked to keynote an international conference in Australia makes it obvious—or at least I hope it makes it obvious—that I must know what I’m talking about. Establishing credibility is not for YOUR sake as a speaker. It’s for the audience’s sake. They are far more likely to take seriously and implement your ideas if they believe you are an expert.

Another Example of Using a Linking Phrase – In the second story, I also use a Linking Phrase. This one went something like: “You know that sickening feeling when you’re thinking ‘Man…they are not connecting with me’ and even though you’re really into your idea…they are clearly not.”Just as with the previous example, I want the audience to connect my story with their own experiences, so they can remember the pain. This not only helps them “get into” the story, but also increases their motivation to learn how to NOT experience that pain again.

Provide More Context Than I Did – When I listened to the recording, I noticed that I did something I have caught myself doing on other occasions: not giving enough context to make my point clear to the audience. That happened in the second story when I likened the speaker’s exhortations to a particular Far Side cartoon. I simply said something like “It’s like that Far Side cartoon that goes ‘Blah, blah, blah, Ginger. Blah, blah, blah.’” Here’s the cartoon. I should have described the picture, since obviously not everyone has seen it. One of the reasons why I recommend recording your presentations is because it enables you to catch examples of not giving enough detail or context, so you can do so next time.

Take Away Points

  1. Using a self-effacing, amusing story as an opener is a great way to calm your nerves and help the audience bond with you.
  2. Using Linking Phrases helps the listener connect your story with their own experience. This increases their interest, because it shows how what you are talking about is relevant to them.
  3. Record your talks and pay attention to places where a bit more context or explaining might have made your point more clear.
  4. The more you use stories in your presentations, the more fascinating a speaker you will be and the more fun you will have speaking.

If you want to learn how to be a better storyteller, come to the free program “Tell a Better Story. Generate More Interest. Build Your Business” at the Casco Bay Tech Hub, on Dec 11th.

 

Now…For the Recording…

 

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Dec 01, 2014 | 0 comments View Post

“Stories provide inspiration plus simulation”: Judy Robinett and the guys at ILoveMarketing.com show you how

Judy R - ILMWhen I share stories with you, I always try to pick ones that both illustrate how to use storytelling to make your ideas more fascinating and persuasive and…the story itself contains valuable information.

I was just listening to  yet another excellent ILoveMarketing episode and heard an outstanding example of how to use a story to provide both  inspiration and the ” how to”.

BTW, the quote “Stories provide inspiration plus simulation” comes from an important point made by Made to Stick authors Chip and Dan Heath:

“Stories drive action through simulation (what to do) and inspiration (the motivation to do it)”

At 42:40 in the interview titled How You Can Connect With Powerful, Influential People, she shares a very cool story about how she got in front of super successful TV producer Mark Burnett by finding out she can provide value to him. Check it out, both for the useful advice and for a great example of how to use a story to inspire people to see what’s possible and to provide a model for achieving a particular outcome.

She also tells a great story at 45:40 about what she did to get Mark Cuban’s attention…again by providing value. I recommend you listen to that one, too.

Better still, listen to the whole Judy Robinett interview.

Nov 19, 2014 | 1 comment View Post

Use Self-Effacing Humor to Make You More Relatable and… Your Point Punchy

me doing instant perspectiveEven if we aren’t trying to come across as a guru or think we are any better than the people we are speaking to in an audience, just the fact that we are on stage can create a barrier. It can make it harder for people to relate to us. One of the best ways to dismantle this barrier is by telling stories about you making mistakes, about you being imperfect.

Here’s one of my favorite personal examples of using a story to do this. I love to use this story because it not only helps people get it that I realize I’m just a regular guy sharing with them, but that it also helps to make a simple resilience-enhancing technique more memorable because it’s packaged in a funny story.

Stories that include surprise or humor are a great way to make your ideas “Sticky” (vis a vis Made to Stick by Chip and Dan Heath). They make a simple idea–like the one in the video you’ll see shortly–hit home more powerfully than if you just shared the idea, and…they make your point more memorable.

So…start collecting experiences you’ve had where you were “the fool” and think about how you can use them in your presentations to make you more bond-able and make your points hit home harder.

Here’s the link to the story and video on my resilience website WhateverLifeBrings.com.

Aug 18, 2014 | 0 comments View Post

How to Give a TED Talk Worthy Presentation

Chris-Anderson-TED-007Here’s a link to a Harvard Business Review article written by Chris Anderson titled “How to Give a Killer Presentation”

Whether you aspire to do a TED talk or just want to be a more compelling speaker, this is worth checking out.

Aug 11, 2014 | 0 comments View Post

How to Use a Story to Create a Vision of What’s Possible

This video, recorded at a national conference, is of the closing story I used to capture what a resilient, “Bring It On!” workforce looks like.

It’s an example of:

1. Using a story to paint a picture of what’s possible. These are what I call Promise Stories.

2. Using a story to end off your presentation on an inspiring note (or at least I hope they found it inspiring).


 

Jul 29, 2014 | 0 comments View Post
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