Perspective Change Stories–A Gentle, Yet Powerful Way, to Challenge Limiting Perspectives

Adapted from Powerful Storytelling Techniques for Training by David Lee

Perspective Change Stories are one of my favorite among the transformational storytelling genre.

They are classic examples of what makes storytelling so powerful—yet gentle.

Rather than challenge a client’s limiting or counterproductive perspective and trigger resistance, you can use a Perspective Change Story that takes them on a journey which organically results in a perspective shift (for the protagonist in the story)

When people hold tightly to their position or belief, direct attempts at challenging them typically result in defensiveness and resistance. Telling a Perspective Change Story bypasses these responses because as mentioned previously, you are “just telling a story”, so there is nothing to defend against or resist.

Here’s an Example

Here’s a Perspective Shift Story I’ve used over the years to illustrate the practice of cultivating  “Instant Perspective” and to make the idea more memorable. Now…if I had told this in a coaching setting, I would have told it somewhat differently and for different reasons.

When To Use Perspective Change Stories

• When coaching or counseling someone who has an entrenched view of another person and you want them to consider an alternative view.
• When coaching or counseling someone who has an entrenched perspective about an issue or problem they’re facing, and can’t see any alternative perspectives.
• When teaching a group where you either suspect or know a number of participants hold onto a limiting perspective about a relevant issue and you want to stimulate them to see other, more useful ways of looking at the issue.
• In any situation where you believe a direct approach to offering a different perspective would be met with resistance or defensiveness.
  

Types of Perspective Change Stories

Brand New Perspective Stories

In this type of Perspective Change story, you share how you or another person had a particular perspective about something and then something happened to change it.

Opening a Closed Mind Stories: Moving From Certainty to Uncertainty

While New Perspective stories are designed to stimulate the listener to consider the new perspective described in the story, Opening a Closed Mind stories are designed simply to stimulate the listener to take the first step in considering a new perspective: being willing to consider there might be an alternative perspective.If someone adamantly states their position is right and even self-evident, they are fairly impervious to feedback and alternative perspectives.

The first step towards their being open to feedback or entertaining a different perspective is going from certainty—“Of course I’m right”–to uncertainty—“I wonder if I could be wrong about this.”When uncertain or confused, we are far more open to feedback and input. That’s the rationale behind telling someone a story about how someone discovered that an idea or perspective they thought was self-evident was actually incorrect.

Such stories can help the listener shift from certainty to uncertainty, which opens the door to their considering alternative perspectives.For a well known example of a Perspective Change Story, do an internet search for Valerie Cox’s The Cookie Thief.

That short story in poem format does a great job of dramatizing a self-righteous perspective and by doing so, connecting the reader with their own version of such a judgment. Then, in a surprise ending, the story presents a totally different perspective on the person the protagonist was  judging.

The following themes provide great potential for shifting people from certainty to uncertainty:

• Stories where you “knew” you were right about something, and then you discovered you were wrong.

• Stories where you engaged in the cognitive error “mind reading” and assumed you knew another person’s intention, only to discover you were wrong.

• Stories where you firmly believed a problem was all someone else’s fault, and then discovered later you had a significant role.

Tips on Telling Perspective Change Stories Effectively

1. When you describe the perspective that you had in the beginning of the story, you want to describe it in such a way that resonates with the “of course this is the way it is” perspective you are trying to challenge. So for instance you might say “So I’m thinking ‘how selfish can one person be?’ You know the type of person who seems to only think of themselves and not consider how their actions are going to affect other people?”
2. Make sure you do not telegraph through word choice or voice tone that the protagonist’s initial perspective is going to turn out incorrect. That’s why you want to use words and voice tone that communicate certainty that this perspective is the correct one. So, for instance, in the example just given, as you were saying “So I’m thinking ‘how selfish can one person be?’ You know the type….” You would say it with a voice dripping with self-righteousness and certainty in one’s judgment of the other person.
3. Whenever possible, use stories where YOU had a perspective shift, especially situations where you just “knew” something was a certain way and discovered that it actually wasn’t. I like doing this partly because it helps reduce the power differential between you and the client. You’re communicating “I’m just a fellow human on a journey” vs. “I think of myself as a guru and I’m here to help little, unevolved, troubled you.” It also models mature self-awareness and humble acceptance of human imperfection. At the risk of stating the obvious, you want to choose situations that don’t reveal TMI or could send a counterproductive message.

To learn how to use this and other transformational storytelling genres in your work, check out:

Advanced Transformational Storytelling seminar on September 21st  in Westbrook, Maine

Advanced Transformational Storytelling

A Workshop for Counselors, Coaches, and Change Agents

with David Lee

September 21st |  8:30-3:30 | Westbrook, Maine

Click to download printer-friendly PDF

What is Transformational Storytelling?

Transformational storytelling is different from “basic” storytelling in that it brings far greater precision and power to storytelling. While many counselors and coaches use stories to illustrate important points, transformational storytelling brings a whole new level of precision and clarity to finding, creating, and using stories and analogies that address specific problems and issues.

By understanding the structure of the different transformational story genres, helper, healers, and change agents can generate stories that can bypass the filters and limiting beliefs of the conscious mind, and  impact at a deep, unconscious level.

It is based on the work of Dr. Milton Erickson.

Dr. Erickson is often considered as the originator and master of hypnotic storytelling. His ability to both use therapeutic metaphors and hypnosis to catalyze healing was legendary, and was the subject of many books. For an example of his work, check out this article.

And Why Am I Teaching This?

Transformational Storytelling is based on my training  in hypnotic storytelling that started 30 years ago. I studied with several of Dr. Milton Erickson’s most prominent students–Stephen and Carol Lankton, Bill O’Hanlon, and Dr. Jeffrey Zeig.

Since then, I’ve applied this modality to counseling (in a previous career), coaching, and teaching. I’ve taught workshops and presented at conferences on this topic throughout the US and have one of my therapeutic stories  included in the book Tales of Enchangement: Goal-Oriented Metaphors for Adults and Children in Therapy

When I learned how to use therapeutic storytelling in my work, everything changed.  Not only did it help me facilitate change when traditional “talk therapy” was not able to, it helped invite people to look at their world in a new way far more effectively than did more  direct approaches.

When I left the counseling field and moved into the corporate world of consulting and coaching, I found stories to be extremely useful in making one’s ideas more interesting and impactful.

I also LOVE storytelling because it enables each person to use their innate creativity and artistry.

One of the coolest things for me is to have people tell me how they never realized they could tell great stories with a purpose until we met. BTW…”with a purpose” is a key here.

Being an effective transformational storyteller isn’t about holding forth or being a raconteur. It’s about knowing how to capture everyday life experiences and turn them into stories that can make a point him home, challenge a limiting belief, offer a new perspective, and even catalyze deep, unconscious healing.

You can read more about my journey with storytelling in the About section of this website.

Why Is Transformational Storytelling Such an Important Tool for Counselors, Coaches, and Change Agents to Have?

Stories enable you to…

1. Challenge people without coming across as confrontational – Stories help you challenge people’s limiting beliefs, perceptions, and attitudes without triggering defensiveness and resistance, because you’re not challenging them. You’re simply telling a story. Thus, telling a story can often reach a person for whom direct approaches have only triggered defensiveness and resistance. Thus, storytelling is an especially powerful way of helping people who are defensive about a particular issue (or defensive in general).
2. Open people’s minds to new possibilities in ways that direct approaches can’t – Because stories well told act like virtual reality, they provide people a non-threatening environment to vicariously experience new ways of acting and responding. Rather than dismissing a direct recommendation, the listener can listen to this new way of acting without defending their perceived limitation. They don’t need to say “You don’t understand, I can’t do what you’re asking me to do” because it’s “just a story”. That receptive state of mind enables them to entertain new possibilities.
3. Make your ideas and recommendations more understandable, compelling, and memorable. This increases your ability to influence others—In Made to Stick, Chip and Dan Heath identify storytelling as one of the key components of messages that are “sticky”—i.e. make a strong visceral impact and stay with the listener long after.
4. Make new concepts and complex ideas understandable to the novice—Simple stories and analogies help you translate foreign concepts into ideas and experiences familiar to the learner. This translation of the foreign into the familiar dramatically accelerates  understanding.
5. Make your presentations more fascinating, compelling, and memorable—Whether you are leading a small educational group or presenting at a conference, stories grab your audience’s attention, impact them at an emotional level, and make your presentation more entertaining. They also give your message staying power by making it live on in the listener’s mind.(note: the above is excerpted from Storytelling Techniques for Trainers by David Lee)

What You Will Learn in This Workshop

1. When to use storytelling as your preferred communication approach.
2. How to use “If I could handle THAT, I can handle THIS” stories–These are great for helping shift people from feeling dis-empowered and hopeless–a state that makes it nearly impossible to see potential solutions and opportunities–to feeling strong and hopeful.
3. How to Use “So I said to him/her…” Stories To Challenge Someone W/O Being Confrontational— These are fun, powerful stories that allow you to deliver a potentially hard-to-hear message or piece of advice in a non-threatening way.
4. How to Use Perspective Shift Stories When Direct Attempts to Help Someone See Their Situation Differently Are Met Resistance–We’ve all had those frustrating experiences where our attempts to help a client see their situation differently are met with resistance and defensiveness.  In these situations, Perspective Shift Stories shine. hese stories are especially useful when you’ve found that direct approaches only result in your client doubling down on their insistence that there is other way to look at a situation than the one they have.

About the Presenter: David Lee is the founder of HumanNature@Work and a career coach at Heart At Work Associates. He has been using and teaching transformational storytelling for 30 years.

He has taught workshops, and presented at conferences, on this topic throughout the US, Canada, and Australia.

His work on therapeutic storytelling was included in the book Tales of Enchangement: Goal-Oriented Metaphors for Adults and Children in Therapy.

If you want to get more of a sense of David’s work, you will find videos and audios from a resource page created for a counseling graduate school class he guest taught at.

Date and Time: Sept 21st, 8:30 – 3:30 (lunch on your own from 11:45-1:00)

Location: Husson University,  340 County Rd, Westbrook, Maine

Fee: Early Bird Rate Ends Sept 11th $149, Procrastinator Bird Rate (after the 31st) $199

To Register:

Comments from program participants

“The highlight of the Maine Career Development Association conference this spring was David Lee’s workshop on Resiliency.  I found his ability to captivate and engage the audience, from the moment we walked through the door until the very end, impressive and rare. David’s dynamic, storytelling presentation style both teaches and inspires through his sharing of humorous, relatable stories that speak to the opportunity for personal growth and transformation throughout our lives.” – Kathy Bouchard, Career Advisor, Goodwill Industries, ME

“David Lee spoke during a class I took on career development as a graduate student.  From the beginning of his presentation, David had my rapt attention.  He was engaging and attentive as a facilitator and modeled the content about which he spoke, which was on how to use storytelling as a counseling and  presentation tool. I saw David a couple of years later in a different context and immediately remembered him and his workshop – it stuck with me because of its impact on my development as a professional.” – Holly Khiel, Career Advisor, Goodwill Industries, ME

“David, thanks again for coming in to talk with my counseling students about the power of storytelling as a counseling modality. One of the things I noticed most about you is your ability to reach all of my students, even those who weren’t interested in the topic prior to your coming. Your presentation demonstrated storytelling as a powerful way to connect with people in a deeply personal way.” – Greg Fall Adjunct Professor, USM, ME

“David Lee is a creative storyteller who can translate simple everyday life encounters into engaging stories that impact at a visceral, experiential level.

He also creates archetypal, mythic stories carefully designed to dissolve limiting beliefs and facilitate deep unconscious healing.

I had not heard of storytelling as a therapeutic tool when I first attended a therapeutic storytelling workshop of David’s more than 20 years ago, at a national conference.

His work has had a huge impact on me both personally and professionally. Personally, because I was a demo subject for his workshop, and the story he told played a major role in my willingness to leave a successful practice as an oncologist and embark on a whole new career.

Even though the mythical story he told had nothing to do—at the conscious level—with my particular dilemma, or even modern day life, the deep archetypal themes clearly impacted at the unconscious level. I believe it played an important role in my deciding to make the leap.

At a professional level, his teaching and coaching on storytelling helped me change my belief, created from years as a practicing physician, that I was not capable of the more right-brained process of storytelling.

I have found myself over the years becoming extremely comfortable, and intentional, in my use of storytelling as a way to invite people to see their world in new, more possibility-filled ways.

I highly recommend you experience his unique, imaginative approach to this powerful communication medium.” – Dr. Bonnie Vestal, ID

Storytelling for Coaches and Leaders: “If I can handle THAT, I can handle THIS” Stories

Storytelling is a great way for coaches to help a client shift to a more empowered state so they can start to problem-solve and brainstorm how to deal with a challenging situation.

As long as the client is feeling overwhelmed and impotent, they aren’t able to consider possibilities or problem-solve. They need to shift to a more positive emotional state for them to see possibilities and solutions.

Here’s an excerpt from a program I did on resilience where I tell them a story about where my interest in resilience came from and then used this as an example of how to use “If I handle THAT, I can handle THIS!” stories to shift people to a more powerful, optimistic state.

These stories are also a great example of using storytelling in business, more specifically how leaders can use stories to “rally the troops” when they are feeling stuck or overwhelmed in the face of major obstacles. This kind of story also helps leaders inspire employees to believe that a difficult change initiative is truly positive. By recalling past challenges they’ve overcome, the leader not only reminds employees “We can do this because we’ve done hard things before” telling the story shifts the listener’s state (i.e. their employees) and in that more inspired state, they are more able to see the change as possible.